Wednesday, October 17, 2007

The Halloween Conundrum... and why I heart Stephen Colbert

So I know some of you may have expected the second wall post to be filled with more wedding/honeymoon goodness. That post will be forthcoming, but, seeing as how I have no pictures on my compy at work, I must address a few other integrally important issues. Or something like that...

First off, Greg and I are hosting a Halloween party. A delightful idea, I'd say-- one that was completely because of the genius that is my husband-- yet we can't seem to come up with an enthralling idea for our costumes. This is unusual for me. Typically, I am the empress of all that is Halloween... but alas, I am at a loss. The "costume conundrum" has been on my mind this morning, whilst NOT doing boring data entry, and I STILL am at a loss. Perhaps the Gregory will just have to choose, and I will comply. This scenario will probably be our best best, in spite of some residual Italian stubborness that I am trying to suppress. Because I say I don't care, but then I have no problem nixing ideas when I don't like them. Shrug.

Another qualm I have been having with my second-favorite holiday is the abundance of quote/unquote "slutty" Halloween costumes. Now this is nothing new, for I know many who have addressed this idea for years, but I am still astounded at how many naughty nurse costumes are available. And naughty school girl costumes. And naughty librarians, naughty nuns and other naughty things. What are they going to think of next? Naughty Astronaut? Naughty Lunch Lady? Honestly, people! The whole notion that Halloween is an excuse for chicks to receive the "get-out-of-being-responsible-for-dressy-slutty free" card is absolutely asinine. But, like I said, this is nothing new. Perhaps I'll be a Playboy Bunny. And Greg can be Hugh Hefner. That'll be totally classy and original.

On to another topic that I feel like writing about today. Greg and I have gotten into the habit of TiVo-ing (or is it DVRing??) The Colbert Report. (Pronounced KOL-BEAR RE-PORE... because it's intellectual.) For those of you who are unaware of this glorious program, it is in essence a parody of real news and opinion shows (like the O'Reily Factor, or the Abrams Report) that oft times pushes the envelope and people's buttons. I enjoy Colbert's sardonic deadpan as he counters arguments with ludicrous statements like: "If you non-Catholic Christians are upset, well just have your Pope issue a reponse. Oh that's right, you don't have a Pope. Because your faith is defective. Sorry, Catholicism is clearly superior. Don't believe me? Name one Protestant denomination that could afford a $660 million sexual abuse settlement. I think that Lord has spoken on this one." Or this one, "I don't see color. People tell me I'm white and I believe them, because police officers call me 'sir'."

These statements get you a little hot under the collar? You're not alone. But his deadpan delivery and vocal inflection are priceless. You never really know what his true opinion is, because he too busy playing the opposite side of everyone's argument. Maybe it's the biting sarcasm, maybe it's the absurdity or maybe I'm just bored. At any rate, I thoroughly enjoy the Colbert Report.

Bet you wish that this was a cute and fluffy wedding post now, huh? He hee.


Josh & Kenna said...

Your writing style is priceless. I think I'm going to enjoy your blog.

Ash said...

NO. I don't, but thanks. You definitely are my friend if you are a fan of Stephen Colbert. Sometimes I can't decide who I like more-him or Dwight. Probably Stephen because he isn't fictional. My favorite is the "Better know a district" segment. I pee my pants even more now that I have had a baby...sorry, that's gross, but lamentably true.

A Playboy bunny in garments...mmmhhh. Attractive.

Kendal Jessup said...

oh I'm so glad you have a blog now. I just don't get enough of your fun work emails, so this will do justice.

Brady and Lauren said...

Welcome to the blogging world! i hope you guys have a great honeymoon and have been able to settle in a little. Good luck with the costume...Halloween is the best!!!